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ADOPTION INFORMATION

Adoption has been such a silent alternative that often teens and their families do not even think about it in the crisis of a pregnancy. But research has shown that if adoption is simply mentioned as an alternative, the number of times it is chosen increases dramatically. Research has also shown that the earlier in pregnancy that adoption is mentioned, the more likely it is to be the option chosen.

Listed below are some links and information on adoption. These are excellent sources for adoption information which should help you in getting started on the path to putting your child up for adoption. Additionally you can call our Right to Life statewide toll-free line to speak with someone ready to help you at:
1-877-CHOOSE LIFE (2466735)

Five Adoption Myths and Realities - Click Here!

Crisis Pregnancy Centers - Tennessee Right to Life Crisis Pregnancy Centers Page
Throughout the United States, there are nearly 3,000 Crisis Pregnancy Centers staffed by volunteers ready to provide real help to women facing unplanned or untimely pregnancies. In addition to providing pregnancy tests and counseling, these centers often offer a full range of services, helping women obtain housing, maternity and baby clothes, baby equipment, pre- and post-natal medical care, legal assistance and financial support, information about adoption, and even advice on how a woman in school can continue her education.

Middle Tennessee Adoption Coalition - www.tennesseeadoption.org 
The Inter-Agency Adoption Coalition is a group of adoption agencies, adoption support organizations, attorneys and adoption professionals in the Middle Tennessee area. The Coalition serves all members of the Triad, i.e. the adoptive parents, the birth parents, and, especially, the child, and supports all different types of adoptions, including domestic, international, independent, related-person and special needs. The Coalition is dedicated to ensure that all adoptions are handled in a personal and caring manner.

Mercy Ministries of America - www.mercyministries.org
A Nashville based pro-life ministry that has been providing help for young women facing unplanned pregnancies for over 18 years. The President and Founder, Nancy Alcorn developed a program for young women, using God's Word as the foundation; giving young troubled women as well as unwed mothers a practical way to choose life for themselves as well as their unborn children. The ministry provides counseling in a residential setting to each and every young woman completely free of charge. They operate two licensed adoption agencies for those young women who choose to place their babies for adoption; and provide parental training and support for those who choose to parent their babies. All of their adoption services are free of charge as well, and each young woman is integral in choosing the adoptive couples.

Alliance for Children - www.allforchildren.org
The Alliance for Children is an adoption agency helping find permanent homes for children from Ecuador, China and Romania. AFC's web site provides valuable information to prospective adoptive parents interested in adopting a child from any of these countries such as a list of qualifications, personal adoption stories, and links to other Web sites.

Bethany Christian Services - www.bethany.org
Web site for the well-known abortion alternative provider and adoption agency. Have a friend in a crisis pregnancy situation? Check this page for help.

National Adoption Center - www.inet.net:80/adopt
NAC is a national organization assisting with adoption here in the United States.

Independent Adoption Center - www.webcom.com/~nfediac
The Independent Adoption Center is another source for information on adoption in the United States.

CFAS Child and Family Adoption Services Society - www.ads-online.on.ca/CFAS/cfas.html
CFAS Child and Family Adoption Services Society is a non-profit society incorporated in 1992 under The Societies Act of British Columbia, Canada.

Adoption.com - www.adoption.com
We are the central location for adoption on the Internet, providing resources for all individuals whose lives are touched by adoption. We have The Adoption Daily News, The Adoption Library, The AdoptionTalk bulletin boards, a live chat room and many other resources.

Voices of Adoption - www.ibar.com/voices
Voices of Adoption is an all-volunteer website and organization that provides a forum for members of the adoption triad. The adoption triad includes Birthfamilies, Adoptive Families, and Adoptees. Voices of Adoption includes free space for personal stories, articles, reviews of adoption resources, and a listing of adoption-related sites and events

Adoption Agencies.Org - www.adoptionagencies.org
AdoptionAgencies.Org is a unique alliance of adoption agencies who have developed special procedures that allow them to work together using the same resources abroad. By sharing their resources, these agencies are reducing competition and, consequently, the cost of international adoptions.

Info from Presbyterians Pro-Life - www.ppl.org/adoptcor.html
PPL Adoption Resources exists to develop and identify PPL as a resource to the church and to church members on adoption. This new branch of PPL is an exciting one with great potential. Our hope is that PPL can take a leadership role in helping the PC(USA), both nationally and locally, discover ways to promote and support the institution of adoption.

Adoptee Life - www.thankful.org
We simply want to thank our birth parents for choosing adoption, demonstrating a love we will never forget. Our lives with our families have been full of love and support, and we choose to let our appreciation be made public in support of past and future adoptions.

One World Adoption Services - www.oneworldadoptions.org
One World Adoptions was founded by adoptive parents for adoptive parents. Programs offered throughout Russia, Eastern Europe, Asia, and Latin America. Information, education, assistance and support throughout your entire adoption process.
 

Five Adoption Myths and Realities*

Myth #1: The birth mother will regret her decision for the rest of her life. Some believe that adoption is so painful that most women regret the choice all their lives, or that a birth mother who chooses adoption will have serious emotional problems, or that adoption is a more traumatic experience for a woman than abortion.

Reality #1: For the birth parent facing an unplanned pregnancy, making an adoption plan can be a very positive resolution. With support and counseling, most birth mothers who choose adoption based on the best interests of their children and themselves are able to grieve and proceed with the healing process in a positive manner. When the adoption experience is handled properly, most birth mothers feel good about their decision years later.

One study found that teen mothers who chose adoption for their children were as satisfied with their decision as those who chose to parent. Studies have also shown that young women who make adoption plans:

  • Have higher educational aspirations, are more likely to finish school, and less likely to live in poverty and receive public assistance than those who parent.
  • Delay marriage longer and are more likely to marry eventually.
  • Are more likely to be employed 12 months after the birth and less likely to repeat an out-of-wedlock pregnancy.
  • Are no more likely to suffer negative psychological consequences, such as depression, than those who choose single-parenting.

Although there are no studies which actually compare the impact of abortion or adoption for women, recent studies have documented the devastation of abortion and the resulting years of trauma. Women who have abortions experience the death of their children; women who plan adoptions give life.

Myth #2: Birth mothers are uncaring and soon forget about their babies. Some believe that a birth mother who cares about her child would not think of adoption, or that adoption is an irresponsible solution, or that pregnant women who choose adoption take the easy way out, or that a birth mother will eventually forget about the child she placed in adoption.

Reality #2: Birth parents make loving parenting decisions when they plan adoptions. Birth parents who make adoption plans are choosing an option which allows them to fulfill their parenting responsibilities. Adoption is a way to ensure their child's long-term needs are met in the best possible way. In order to do this, they must put their child's needs above their own, a sign of maturity, responsibility, and selflessness. Adoption is by no means taking the easy way out. It is a difficult decision, and young women, especially, need to be supported in this decision by those around them.

Some young women facing an unplanned pregnancy have found it helpful to learn about adoption first-hand from a birth parent who has been through the process. Children are never forgotten by their birth mothers. They always hold a special place in their birth mothers' hearts.

Myth #3: Adoption damages the child. Some believe that adoption damages the child, or that adopted children are not well-adjusted, or have mental health problems, or are damaged by the experience, or will grow up to have serious psychological problems, or feel bitter or rejected.

Reality #3: Adopted children do well in life. A recent study interviewed over 700 teenagers who had been adopted as infants. The study, the largest ever of adopted teens and their families, looked at various indicators of well-being. Among other things, it found these teens:

  • Received and benefited from lots of support from family, friends, and others;
  • Were involved in many positive, structured youth activities, such as sports, music, congregational youth programs, and community organizations;
  • Saw themselves as being as strong as their peers in personal identity and self-esteem;
  • Showed high levels of caring values and behaviors, such as volunteering.

This data corrects the confusion resulting from studies of adopted teens which did not differentiate between teens adopted at infancy and teens adopted at an older age. Children adopted when older usually experience years in the foster care system. Many were abused or neglected in their biological family. They are understandably found in psychological counseling and mental health settings at a higher rate than their non-adopted peers.

Myth #4: Most adoptive parents are unfit. Some believe that adoptive parents are not as fit to raise a child as are the biological parents, or that no one can love a child as much as a birth parent, or that God is punishing childless couples or sending a message that they should not be parents, or that adoptive parents are abusive.

Reality #4: Adoptive parents are as fit and capable as any cross-section of biological parents.
For more than three decades, studies have repeatedly shown the above perceptions of adoptive parents to be absolutely false.

One such study compared government data on four groups: 1-children adopted into a two-parent family; 2-children born into a two-parent family; 3-children being raised by an unmarried mother; 4-children being raised by their grandparents. It found that:

  • Children from Group 1 did well in school, repeating a grade at the rate of only 7 percent compared to 12 percent of children in Group 2.
  • The first two groups of children share similarly high scores regarding general health.
  • Group 1 enjoys a quality of home environment superior to all the other groups.
  • Group 1 has access to health care that is superior to all other groups.

In addition, adoptive parents on the whole are better educated, older and more economically stable than the population at large, and are less likely to divorce.

While we must not downplay the tragedy of child abuse, there is absolutely no evidence to suggest that it occurs particularly or even frequently in adoptive families. In fact, there is evidence to the contrary. This is an unfounded notion which needlessly perpetuates a birth parent's worries, and unnecessarily deters them from considering adoption.

There are countless examples of happy families built through adoption. The overwhelming majority of parents cannot imagine loving a child more than those God has given them through adoption.

Myth #5: The adoption process is secretive. Some believe that adoptive parents know very little information about their child's background, or that birth parents have no say in the choice of adoptive parents.

Reality #5: The adoption process seeks to share information on a level that will benefit all birth parents, adoptive parents and most importantly, the child. Virtually all agencies consult with birth parents to determine what type of family they would select. Many agencies provide the birth parents with family profiles from which they may choose. Pictures, letters and momentous can be shared for a time after placement. Today's practice also shares all available nonidentifying background information with the adoptive parents. This can include the birth parents' family and medical histories, physical descriptions, and personal information.

It is rare for a child not to be aware of his or her adoption into their family. The agonizing over "telling a child he was adopted" of days past seems to have led to the myth that adoption was a negative event in the child's life. Parents today share about adoption with their child from day one, in age-appropriate ways that stress love, permanence, and respect for the birth parents who made such a difficult and loving choice to give their child a family.

*Source: Presbyterians Pro-Life

 

 

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